Me & "Year of Yes" per Shonda Rhimes

Shonda has been a role model for a while. I think she is a brilliant writer and I admire her immensely. The tales she spins are sublime. I am not sure how it took me 9 years to read her book "Year of Yes" but better late than never.

"Saying yes . . . saying yes is courage. Saying yes is the sun. Saying yes is life." - Shonda Rhimes

Shonda and I are, on paper, very different. She is black. I am white. She grew up in a large Catholic family. I grew up in a small atheist family. The differences are many but while reading her book, I have never identified more with someone. Ever.

As a child, Shonda would act out her stories in the pantry of the kitchen and I would do so in my Mom's walk-in closet. We both started laying tracks to our stories in our own covert ways. My guess is that her pantry was one of the few places she could be by her self in a house filled with people. My house was often empty but that closet represented my safe space. Both places were the first places we crafted our stories. I loved being by myself so I could act out my "stories". I was seldom bored, I had my stories.

I am a writer. I am not a writer. How does one get defined as writer? Before reading Shonda's book, I defined this by number of published works. Since, my only claim to publishing fame is a really dry Journal Study from my MBA days, I decided I was not a writer. Shonda redefined this for me by sharing her process, how she views the world and her cast of characters and how "she lays tracks on people". Not since I read "The Big Book" did I have so many aha moments and sighs/laughs/tears of recognition. She poignantly mirrored my relationship to writing. The difference is that she has had the guts to pursue it while I have only done it for me. Hence, I suppose this blog/site is finally dipping my toes in the writing pool.

"It is time to stop standing at the edges of rooms. Hugging the walls. Living in my head. Wishing I had something to say. - Shonda Rhimes"

Laying tracks on people. Shonda describes this as making real life people better by "rewriting" them and making them better. Man, do I do this. When you are in my circle, I lay tracks on you and make you better. Most of the times it is deserved. But sometimes it is not and then when reality comes crashing in and I see your ugly, it hurts.

I picked up the book for the title and because I dig Shonda. I thought I would learn to say Yes more since my auto answer to most social outings is a resounding "NO". My takeaway was not what I expected. I learned that I am actually a writer. Not a writer that writes professionally (yet) but a writer. I am a writer.

To find the book:

The Year of Yes by Shonda Rimes